Goodnight, Hannah
by Laurenhannah2009
Summary: This is about a girl who has lost all of her family. All she has left is her grandparents. After seeing her parents tragic death she comes upon some difficutlies on how she gets through her life.


I was just sitting in my room waiting for the movers to come and get my things. I'm moving away to live with my grandparents on my dad side of the family. Since those are the only people left living. My family just keeps on dying. I loved my parents... well okay maybe I loved my mom and not so much with my dad. He always bugged me all the time. I was being interview with cops a week ago, because my parents killed themselves. Well that's what there saying on the records. It was Friday night and I was at a party after the homecoming game. Yes you can say I was popular, still am really but any who. I was with all of my friends Zoey, Jasibell, Hailey, and Kendra. I had my long red hair in curls, for once it looked right. I was wearing dark blue jeans with this purple shirt. Zoey with her brown eyes and brown short brown hair was wearing a yellow dree. Jasibell se was so pretty that night, she had her long black hair tied up but had two strings hanging down her face. She had on a long green shirt with a black mini skirt. Hailey was pretty much my twin but she wore a yellow dress with her hair up in a hair tie. Kendra doesn't even have to try hard enough to look pretty. She can just put normal clothes on and she's totally hot. All the kids would copy her looks too. When I was at the party I was finally talking to this guy I liked named Jason Blake. He is so cute, with his blonde wavy hair and green eyes with a hint of yellow and brown in there. He was wearing dark jeans with a blue shirt. He looked good in blue. He always made me nervous whenever I was near him. I could not talk at all; my heart would actually stop beating from being in the same room with him. Zoey was trying to help me out with the breathing problem I have when he's around me. I forget to breathe all the time. I seriously need one of those brown paper pages you would pack your lunch in everyday and just breathe in that. Any who back to the party, so I was there with my friends and they left me alone while they went off to talk to the football players. Jason was a running back. So there I am all alone sitting on this old brown couch with loud music blaring on all four walls. Everyone has red cups in their hands but me. I'm the one who got voted to drive home. There was this couple who I really did not know, but they were making out on the couch. Almost having sex, I bet they would have sex if they had a chance. They probably already had sex before. I brush my hair with my hand and look up to see Jason. He gave me a small smile and I gulped. But gave him a short smile in return. He looked over at the couple next to me and he chuckled. Then he just looked back at me still smiling. I knew I was already beat red, so I looked down and bit my lip. I saw his hand on mine. I looked up and took it. He walked me through the loud noise and upstairs. Oh god he wants to have sex with me! But why? His hand was shaking in mine. I squeezed it to calm down, and that helped a little bit. He knocked on one of the doors and no one answered so we went in. We both sat on the bed in silence.

"Sorry I just didn't want to be there anymore. I'm not really into party's. I like to just stay at home and watch movies or read," He babbled nervously.

"Then why do you even come?" I asked while looking at the strange hippie wall patterns, then looked at him.

"Someone has to be the sober one in the group," He shrugged.

"I know what you mean. I too would rather be home," I nodded.

Again there was another awkward of silence.

"You look nice tonight," He said while glancing at me. I smiled.

"Thanks, Zoey helped me out. If it weren't for her I would look like I was still in bed," I laughed. He thank God laughed with me. Then my cell phone rings, we both jump. I answer it. "Hello?"

"Is this Hannah Brooks?" A guy asked.

"Yes who is this?" I demanded. I looked at Jason and he was eyeing me with worry in his eyes.

"You need to come home now. Can someone give you a ride?" he asked.

"Yes, Yes I can find a ride. What happened? Who is this?" I repeated.

"This is detective Marshall and your parents are...dead. So if you can get a ride and come now that would be great," he muttered.

I hung up my phone and dropped it. I could feel the tears starting to come up. My lips are starting to shake and my hands. I didn't even know that Jason was shouting my name till he shook me. I looked right at him with tear drops falling upon my face.

"What happened?" he asked.

"My...my parents," I pointed to my phone. I couldn't even finish but it's like Jason already knew. He got up right away and lifted me up. He walked me through the crowd of people. I didn't even see anyone.

"Hannah! You can't go..." Jasibell was saying until she saw my face. She then looked at Jason. "What happened? Is she okay? What did you do?" she yelled over the blaring music.

Jason ignored her and squeezed my hand. We rushed out into the parking lot and got into this blue jeep. Jason helped me in the passenger's seat and then got in the driver's seat. I was just looking out the window just watching the green trees blowing away. Rain started to poor down. My head just fell against the hard window. My eyes just drifted to the side and watched the black pavement get hit with big rain drops. Then I saw blue and red bright lights from up ahead and I looked up. We were up the street from my house. There was yellow tape around my house and about five cops standing outside of it with clipboards in their hands. Jason stopped behind at the cop's car. I just stared at my parents' bedroom window. The light was still on, and I saw a shadow figure from inside. A knock on the window made me jump and my arms were flying in the air. The cops was there with his big flash light pointing at us. He then turned the flashlight off and I rolled down the window.

"Are you Hannah Brooks?" he asked.

I gave a short nod and the cop gave me one in return. He motioned me to get out of the car. I turn to look at Jason. He took my hand and squeezed it.

"You want me to come with you?" he asked. I nod.

We both got out of the car and ran towards my house. The first thing I noticed was the blood I slipped on when I walked in. Jason caught my fall. I looked up the stairs and saw more blood. I covered my mouth and began to follow it. I don't think no one realized I had moved yet. The cop was talking to Jason asking him questions. My hand slowly traces the bar that helps you walk up the stairs. When I got to the top the blood led into my parent's room. When I was at the door I slowly opened it. My hand covered my mouth as I screamed as loud as I could. My knees dropped to the floor. My mom was on the bed covered in blood with her arms spread out across the headboard. My dad was hanging from the ceiling next to the window, swinging back and forth. With blood dripping from his stomach to his head. They were in their pajamas. As I was screaming at the top of my lungs with my mouth covered. Jason and the cops showed up.

"Get her out of here!" Someone shouted.

Jason's arms went under mine and lifted me up. He picked me up and carried me back downstairs and onto the couch. I started to shiver all over. But Jason never let go of me, he held me in his arms the whole time. After that I don't remember much. I haven't talked to Jason since. He's been calling all the time and so has Zoey. I've just been very isolated lately; I don't want to talk to anyone. After my parents died I've been doing something I really should not be doing but it makes me feel good. Like everything is going to be alright. It takes the pain away. What I have been doing is cutting myself. I only cute myself once a night. A real deep one too. It makes me take a deep sleep. To forget whatever happened to my parents. I want my parents; I want to tell mom that I finally talked to Jason. I want to tell dad that I got all A's on my report card and he can give me one hundred dollars. But now I can't talk to no one. I miss them so much. Who would do that? What did my parents ever do to them? I herd the horn go off and I jumped up and walked slowly to my bedroom door. I turn around and look at my empty room. I close the door behind me and walked down the stairs. I can just see the blood now. I shivered with that thought and finally reached my from door. Who will live in this house now? Will it be occupied? Or will they just leave it empty? I close the door behind me and turned around to see Zoey, Jasibel, Hailey, and Kendra. Their hair is all up in hair ties and wearing our soccer uniforms. I look at them all, to remember them. I felt this tear running down my cheek and all my friends ran up to me and gave me a big hug and we all started to cry together. I look up and see my grandparents' waiting patiently in the car. Then behind the tree I saw Jason peeking through. He looked at me and I looked at him. My friends let go and gave us some privacy. He slowly walked up to me with his hands in his pockets. He took his hand out and brushed it through his hair. My hands hide behind my back and my leg does this twist thing behind my other leg. He was now two feet in front of me.

"Will I," he mumbled.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

We both said that at the same time so we laughed a little.

"I'm going to live with my grandparents until I graduate. Then I'm moving to State University," I blurted out.

"Oh really? 'Cause that's where I'm going," he said happily.

I looked at him.

"Thanks for helping me a couple nights ago," I said.

"It's s'okay I didn't want you to face that alone," he whispered.

"I don't want to move away," I whispered.

"Neither do I," he mumbled. "Will you still be going to our school?".

"No, my grandparents want me to go to Grover High because it's closer," I shook my head.

"Oh," he said.

We both were looking at the ground. This is just going swell. Kiss him, you know you defiantly want to. This is the perfect moment. But then my grandparents honked the horn again. We both were startled.

"I guess I better go," I said as I was walking past him.

"Wait," he blurted out.

I turned around and he walked close to me. He slipped his hand through mine and I felt paper between my fingers. I looked at are hands holding. I forgot to wear a sweater today. It's just so dang hot outside that I couldn't wear one. Jason looks at my wrists and saw what I've done. I quickly took my hand away from his and held it. Then I pulled him into me and gave him a hug. We both held on tight together. I started to cry again. Jeez this just keeps on getting worse. When I finally get close to Jason I have to leave and move away.

"We'll see each other soon," he whispered. "I'll help you get through this Hannah."

I nod and we both let go. I wipe away the rest of my tears away and turned to my grandparent's car and drove off to Grover Township. When I arrived at my grandparents' house it was still as how I remembered. It's very small. A one story house. It's white as the clouds, and its shudders on the windows are blue. With a red door. It looks like something from a story book. It has a trail that leads to the front door with flowers on the sides. All kinds of flowers, red, purple, yellow, and pink. I pick up my bags and walk to the front door. Grandma unlocks the door and gives out a huge breath of fresh air.

"Home sweet home," she says.

I roll my eyes and carry my bags into my new room. I open the door and see white walls. Everything in here is white except for the bed, the bed is blue. It's like a beach house in here. Something tells me that I'm not going to like it here at all.

"Hannah sweetheart come downstairs time for dinner!" grandma shouts from the kitchen.

"Alright I'm coming," I shout back.

After dinner the phone rang. Grandma ands me the phone.

"Hello?" I ask.

"Hannah! it's me Zoey," she squeaked.

"Oh Zoey, I've missed you so. I don't think I can go to Grover high. There our enemies!" I yelped.

"Just breathe. Everything will be okay. So are you and Jason going out now?" she asked.

"I hope so. I mean he's so nice and cute. He did help me out a lot that night," I said.

"Yeah he did. He wouldn't just do that to anyone you know."

"Yeah I know. But what if I meet a new guy at this school?"

"You won't trust me. Remember the football game last week when we creamed them? There were no hot guys at all."

"I hope your right," I mumbled.

"I am. Now you should go to sleep early, you are going there tomorrow aren't you?"

"Yep, sure am."

"Good luck,"

"Thanks I'll need it," I said.

We both hang up. I go and sit on the bed. I pull my knees up to my chest and lay my forehead on my knees. I want my parents. My grandparents put me in all AP classes. Just like at my other school. I try and find something sharp. I look around my new room and could not find anything. So I look into my bathroom and found a razor. I grab one of the white towels and sit in the bathtub. Jeez this tub can fit three people. I get situated and take a deep breath. I place the razor right at the tip of my wrist and pushed down. I gasp in pain. My legs squirm and I cut down deeper. The blood is slipping out of my arm slowly. Then my eyes slowly start to close. I wake up with the alarm beeping loudly in my bedroom. I quickly wipe off the blood from my arm by taking a shower. The blood disappears. As I get out of the shower I get dressed. I pick out just blue jeans and one of my green shirts. Grandma yells my name from the living room. As I step outside it's like one of those creepy movies. Where everyone is all nice and the houses are pictured perfect. Everyone greeting everyone all at once as they step out of their houses. Don't get me started on their gardens. It's all very colorful. One color that I see is getting on my nerves. All I see is green. The ground is covered with grass. The trees leaves are orange, yellow, and red. I see little white rabbits hoping around. Okay now I know I'm not at my grandma's out at all. Where did she go? I know I heard her call my name. Unless if that was a dream? As I'm looking around I see all different kinds of birds flying around. In the corner behind one of the trees I see a buck. A big buck with his mate and children. The kids are playing and running around. I started to follow one of the rabbits that were hopping along a path and I saw feet next to the rabit. I jumped and looked up. It was a girl. Her eyes were so beautiful, crystal clear blue eyes. With bleach blonde hair. Very tall, I would say 5'10''. She smiles at me and hugs me. She starts squeaking and screaming. My arms are as stiff as a board. Now she starts having me jump up and down with her. All of a sudden she stops and is looking at my cut arms. I pull my arms away and cover them up. Why do I always forget to where a jacket?

"Luna don't kill her!" a man yelled but then laughed. I opened my eyes and saw this really cute guy. He had brown shaggy hair with brown eyes to match. He's wearing a black shirt with black pants. Luna shakes her head and smiles up at him and I just keep staring at him. Luna runs over to him and gives him a hug. Then let's go and skips over to me. I flinch when she walks by me. She pats me on the arm and giggles.

"Sorry about that, I'm just so happy to see someone new for a change," she smiles. I nod and look at him.

"Don't worry about Luna she can't hurt a fly," He waves a hand like a fly is flying in his face. "Hey I'm Oliver," he smiles. I nod.

"What's your name?" Luna asked while she tilts her head to the side waiting for my answer.

"Hannah," I whisper. I nervously cover my arms so they can't see the cuts.

"You don't look like a Hannah you look more like an Ingrid," Luna giggles.

"Luna," Oliver said getting annoyed.

"Oh hush Oliver. Now come on let's have you meet the gang," she said while taking my arm and pulling it. I use my other arm to cover my cuts.

As we walk I notice that there's a pathway of flowers. Of all kinds, purple, red, yellow, pink, and orange. We walk through the path and I see even more people. There all sitting together laughing. There sitting on light brown park benches and there's a fountain in the middle. Luna pushes me and makes me stop and I trip over my own shoes. Good thing Oliver was there to catch me. I get up and fix my hair. Then I tuck my hair behind my ears. Luna skips over to this guy whose reading a big book. He had short black hair and when he looked up at me he had these gold eyes. He wore black glasses. He stood up and he was short I would say at least 5'4''. Luna is wearing a aqua shirt with a jean mini skirt. This guy walks with Luna to me. I scoot back but Oliver's hands grab my elbows. The guy stands in front of me like he's examining me or something. He smiles and puts his hand out in front of me.

"Hi my name is Alex, and these other people standing are Christina, and Shane," he pointed to them.

Christina is really pretty like Luna. She has long brown hair, one green eye and one blue. She looks about 5'7''. As she walks to me her hair bounces with every movement. She takes her hand out and I take it.

"Hi I'm Christine," she said. She lets go of my hand and notices my cuts. She takes a step back. Then Shane comes to my sight. He has blonde shaggy hair with brown eyes. Very tall and built, He's gorgeous. He's wearing this blue shirt and tan pants. He smiles and puts his hand out. I just nod. He nods in return and pulls his hand back in.

"Nice to meet you... all," I said while looking at Shane first then at all the rest.

"So what's your name?" Christina asked while giving this smirk look to Shane when he stood by her. Then smiling back at me.

"Oh sorry my name is Hannah," I said while shaking my head. "So where are we?"

They all looked at each other than to the ground. Alex then looked up.

"We don't know. We showed up one day and we never leave here ever," he said.

"You all came here at the same time?" I asked.

"No, no," Alex shook his head. "Luna was the first one than I came, after that then it was Shane and Christina. Oliver showed up a couple days ago."

"Oh," Is all I could find to say.

Shane walks towards me and puts his arm around the back of my neck.

"So do you know why your here?" he asks.

"If I did I wouldn't have asked you what this place was," I said.

"Oh burn... Hannah you'll get along great here," said Oliver.

"Funny 'cause that's what I was just thinking," I chuckled.

These aren't really the friends that I have back home but I like them. Especially Oliver. Then this loud beeping noise comes from all around and we all plug our ears. I close my eyes until the beeping stops. Finally it stops and I open my eyes to find myself in the bathtub. That was a dream? No, no, no! I was actually happy there. Oh Oliver. Will I ever see them again? I get up and quickly wipe off the blood and take a shower. After that I put on a pair of blue jeans and a purple shirt. My hair is long and straight. Grandma calls me from the living room again. I'm just making sure that's it's not my dream again. Even though I really want it to be. For the first time it never made me want to cut myself. Grandma stands at the door waiting for me. She drops me off to Grover High School. It's so small. One floor, there's bout twelve windows across in the front. Two doors that lead you into the school. And the students all outside talking to one another next to the fountain. There are stone benches all around, and trees. I get out of the car and grandma just leaves. I put my backpack over my left shoulder and take a deep breath and start walking towards the entrance of the school. I look around, already lost. Everyone just passes by me and doesn't even know I exist. Wow I went from popular to ugly duckling. Everyone here is beautiful. I try and look for signs to the office but there's nothing. I start walking one way not watching where I'm walking and I completely run into someone. Books and papers fly all over, and I gasp then moan. I try to help the person gather up their stuff when our hands brushed over each other. We both look up and Oliver? He shakes his head and puts his stuff neatly back stacked up. He gets up and rubs his hands on his pants. And brushes his hand through his hair. Then he holds his hand out to help me up. I take it but then he notices my scars. Again I forgot a jacket damn it. This is not a good day already. He quickly looks down as I hide my pain away. He clears his throat.

"S-sorry I-," I said very nervously.

"It's s'okay I didn't see where I was going," he finished. Then he tilted his head as I bit my lip. "Are you okay?"

I shake my head. "I'm sort of lost," I said while biting my lip again. He laughs.

"Here let me help you," he said as he pulled me to his side and walked me to the office. We arrived there just in seconds. I was going the right way. He opens the door for me and walks in. I nod and he follows behind. A lady at the front desk looks at me, then her eyes widen when she sees... what's his name? She makes a smile that goes to her eyes.

"Hello Evan nice to see _you_ in here," she said in sarcasm.

"You to Ms. Parker so glad to see _you_. Did you miss me?" he asked in the same tone. I tried really hard not to laugh when she made this look on her face. The annoyed look. Her mouth drops then she looks at me. Her mouth zips right up and she smiles.

"Hello and your name is?" she asked while getting very irritated.

"Uh...Hannah Brooks I'm new and I need my schedule," I smile back trying to match her tone. I could here Evan chuckle in the back. She goes into the principle office and then he comes out from behind her. Evan takes two steps forward and his elbow brushes against me. I look down where are elbows met then Evan cleared his throat. I looked up and the principle was right there. I look up and he gives a good hard look at me then he smiles.

"Well Miss. Brooks I think you will like it here at Grover High," he glances over at Evan and shakes his head. Evan just smiles back at him. "Looks like you have a bright future. I've looked at your grades from your last school and very impressive," he smiles. I look down and bit my lip. "Now then Mr. Carter will take you to your first class since he has it with you, so run along now you don't want to be late for your first class," he said while waving his hand. Evan put his hand on my back and he pushed me out the door. He takes my schedule out of my hands and shakes his head.

"Well aren't you just a little smart one Ms. Brooks," he ticked.

I make a face and try to get my schedule away from his. He shakes his head again.

"What?" I squeaked.

"Look at it! AP English, AP Physics, AP Calculus, AP Chem. "he shakes his head again and ticks. "Oh wait look here you have study hall and band. Ah no not this class," He points to it when I look at it. "Yearbook? really? You trying to be popular already."

"Hey can I have that back please!" I jump up and grab it from him.

"Well at least we have study hall together," he grins.

"Yay me!" I cheered.

"I know I'm like freaking' awesome!" he said while waving his hands in the air. We go into room 109 and I give the teacher Mr. Heath the note where the teachers have to give the 'okay' for me to be in there class. He signs it and then stands up. Oh God this is where he introduces me in front of the class. I close my eyes and he gets behind me and puts his hands on my shoulders. Everyone looks up at me and I bit my lip.

"Everyone this is Hannah Brooks she's new so make her feel welcome," he shouts. I flinch and his arm expenses toward an empty desk in the back. I walk to the desk and already I hear whispers coming from people as I walk by. Some are gasps and the others are about how they now about my parents. I sit down and hide behind my hair. Mr. Heath told us to start our homework or whatever we have to do and try to keep quiet. I lay my head on the desk and close my eyes. Then someone taps my desk. I open my eyes and see Evan. He must have traded seats with someone 'cause this girl was sitting next to me.

"Hey," he whispers. I look up at him and give him a glare. "What! did I wake you up? Oh I'm sorry I just didn't want you to get in trouble," he huffs.

"Sorry Evan I'm just really tired," I breathed as I noticed that my scars were out where everyone can see! I folded my arm and lay my head on it.

"Gotcha say no more," he nods and stares at the girl in front of me. He gives her a poke on her side, she jumps and turns to me. I shake my head and point to Evan. She looks at him and rolls her eyes and turns back to her paper. I giggle and he smiles at me. "What?!"

I shake my head while waving my hands like I'm doing the patty cake. "Nothing, nothing at all," I chuckle. Mr. Heath looks up at us and I start to fake cough. Evan chuckles. Now some people are staring at us. I feel my cheeks starting to burn. I look down and bit my lip. The bell finally rings and at every other class the teacher made me stand in front of the class and have me introduce myself. I hate being in front of the class. I get so nervous that my hands start shaking, and when I'm talking my speech shakes and I babble. Hopefully no one will look at my scars. Then the teacher would stop me and have me take a seat in the back because they are the only seats left in class. Lunch time came around. I get in line and get a bacon cheeseburger with fries. I look around the cafeteria. I already know there are groups already sitting together. The far left is the popular table. The far right are the so called 'normies'. The middle are the jocks. The upper left are the geeks. The upper right are the losers. I start walking out of the cafeteria and into the hallway where the drugies eat. Or the 'I'm popular so I don't have to sit in the cafeteria because it's so not cool group. I sit between the wall and the lockers. People walk by me and look but then just keep on walking. Then I hear a familiar voice.

"Oh Evan must you scare off the newbie's?" a girl ask. Even though that's Luna's voice. As they start to walk by Evan sees me and frowns. He walks over and sits next to me. The girl who looks just like Luna comes and sits down next to Evan. Evan looks at me and nudges his elbow against mine. His eyes travel to the girl and he does this sigh and frown thing. Luna smiles widely at me and I give a little smile and bit into my bacon cheeseburger.

"My name is Lexi," she smiles. I nod and but my burger down.

"I'm Hannah," I smile back. Wow déjà vu. I really miss them. I wonder if I'll dream of them tonight.

"You like it here so far?" Lexi asks while tilting her head to the side.  
"I guess so I mean my school is a lot different," I say while nodding. She too nods.

"Yeah our school is so...what's the word I'm looking for?" she tilts her head at Evan and he just shrugs."Oh never mind I had no idea where I was going with that anyways," she giggles.

We talk for a while then the bell rings. Next was AP English. After the last three classes school was over. I got out of the building and looked around for grandma. Of course she's not here. I wait and the sidewalk when someone bumps into my shoulder. I stumble a little but I catch myself this time. I prop my back pack back up at my shoulder and turn around. Oh my God it's...Jason! We both stare at each other and then he blinks. Then we stand up and smile at each other. I'm so nervous I've forgotten how to move or talk. I just bite my lip. He chokes out a laugh and I laugh with him. Oh how I missed him. He holds out his hand and I take it. We start walking until I hear my name being called. I turn to see Evan. He's pushing his way through people and waving his hand around for me to notice him. He trips over a few people and then he finally reached me. He starts to breath heavily then he calmed down.

"You need a ride?" he pants.

I look at Jason who did a crooked smile and then I shake my head. Evan stands up right away and looks at Jason. I get this nervous feeling that Evan might do something to Jason so I went in between them.

"Evan this is Jason my,,,um..." Should I say boyfriend or friend? "My friend."

Evan jerks up at the part where I said friend. But then Jasons head went down. Ah jeez I'm so stupid. Evan takes his hand out and shakes it. I give a short smile. This is very awkward right now. Then someone tickles my sides and I jump and see Zoey, and behind her is Kendra, Jasibel, and Hailey. We all scream and I hug them all. When were done Zoey was the first one to talk.

"Jason gave us a ride to see you since Jasibel's mom took her car away," she groans. Jasibel shrugs.

"What?! I can't help it if someone was texting me and I happen to answer it while I was driving," she gives us a cheesy smile. Yeah little miss innocent. We all laugh then hug each other again.

"Oh I missed you guys so much!" I squeak.

"Thank Jason for that," Hailey said while winking at Jason. I turn to look at him and I wrap my arms around his neck.

"Thank you so much Jason!" I squeak again. His arms wrap around my waist and he chuckles. We hold each other for a few seconds forgetting that I had my best friends here. Then someone cleared their throat and I let go and go by his side. I couldn't help but smile. Neither can he for the looks of it. Then all of my friends giggled. Embarrassed, I could feel my cheeks getting apple dark red. Now it was just everyone staring at each other.

"Oh shoot!" Zooey moaned. "I have to go to cheerleading practice and so do you guys," she said while pointing at the other three. "Sorry Hannah, I wish you were at our school again. Thanks for having me be team captain."She said with a smile.

"No problem I thought that the one with the second most votes for captain should get it, you deserved it." I give her the same smile. Jason put his arm around my waist.

"We'll meet you in the car Jaosn," Kendra waved while the rest were walking ahead of her.

Jason stayed and hugged me again. This time he gave me a kiss on the ckeek. I closed my eye, dreaming that he was at my _new _school.

"I don't want to go," he whispered in my ear.

"Then don't," I whisper back. We faced each other and he kissed me, on the lips. His lips are nice and warm. Very gentle to me. My arms were around his neck playing with his hair. While one of his hand was on my back and the other around my waist. I didn't want him to stop. I made a little squeak noise and he did a little moaning noise in my mouth. His tongue played with mine exploring my mouth. And I was doing the same to him. I heard someone clearing their throat again. I open my eyes to find the principle standing right there behind Jason. I stop and turn Jason around. He chokes a little and steps to my side. The principle tilts his head at me.

"Well Ms. Brooks how was your first day?" he asked.

"Um...g-good sir," I stuttered. Jason gives a little chuckle and I elbowed him on the side.

"Great!" he cheered then looked at Jason then back at me. "Well then have a good day Ms. Brooks. See you bright and early tomorrow!"

"You t-to sir," I stuttered again and giggled. The principle just nods and walks to his car.

"So Hannah you need that ride home?" Evan asks. I look at him totally forgetting that he's even there. I look at Jason and he just shrugged.

"I have to go drive them home. I'll call you later okay?" he asked as he's giving me a hug.

"Okay, "I whisper to him

I got into Evan's car and we drove off. His car was small. The interior was peeling off and the silver paint was too. He said it was made in 1967. He says when he gets the money he's going to restore it from its glory. As we were at a stop light he cleared his throat.

"So...is Jason y-your b-boyfriend?' he studred. I turned my head to look at him and he was blushing. I give a little smile and shrugged.

"To tell the truth...I-I don't really know," I shook my head. He looks at me and gives me a crooked smile and then the light turned green. We got to my grandparents house and he stopped the car on the other side of the road. It was an awkward silence for a minute then I saw red lights beaming ahead of us. I turn my head away from Evan and look straight ahead. The ambulance were at my grandparents house! I quickly got out of the car and ran into the house. I opened the door and saw my grandma lying on the floor with the phone in her hand. I covered my mouth and fell to my knees. The ambulance people came in and the police. I kept looking at grandmas eyes. They were as black as the night's sky. All of a sudden I jumped and screamed when someone put their hands on my shoulders. I looked to my side as they were kneeling down and it was Evan. A bulky cop came over by us and knelt down in front of me. I blinked and looked at him.

"I'm sorry Miss but you have to get out of here. Is there anyone else that lives with you?" he asked as he looks right at me.

"My-my grandpa but he should be getting home golfing right now," I muttered.

"Okay we'll give him a call. Can you go anywhere right now? Your parent's maybe?"

"My parent's are-are dead," I stuttered then looked down.

"Oh," is all he said and got up and walked away. I started to cry and rocked myself back and forth. But I couldn't because Evan was still holding my shoulders.

"Hannah you want to stay at my house?" he asked in a whisper.

I can't stay at Evan's house! Oh I know I should call Zoey or Kendra or even Hailey...Jasibells parents doesn't let people stay with her on a school night. They all live like an hour away from here. I would have to get up very early and have one of them drive me here. Unless if Jason would do it. Ah man I might have to stay with Evan. Oh wait! I can stay at Lexi's house. Evan is still waiting for my answer. I'll just say 'thanks but no thanks I'm going to see if I can't stay at Lexis's' Yeah that would work.

"Yes," I answered. I blinked and Evan helped me up. He held onto my left arm as were walking back to his car. We didn't talk the entire ride there. I had my legs up against my chest and they were shaking. So were my hands. My teeth were clotting a little bit but not as much as my hands shaking. It was almost an hour ride to his house. His house was huge. Two story's tall. An old 18th century type house. The house was white with blue shudders and blue door. No garden or walk path. There was a tree in the front yard with a tire swing hanging from on off the branches. A couple bird houses were hanging from the tree too. A couple feet away from it was a small bird bath, where there were a few birds in there splashing each other and it sounded like they were laughing. Evan came out from behind me and carried my left arm again. When we were at the front door, Evan tried to get his keys out of his pocket when the door flung open. A little boy answered it with a little girl too. The little girl had long blonde curly hair with blue eyes and the little boy had short brown hair with brown eyes to match. They looked about seven or eight. They were very cute, and skinny too. I'm pretty sure their twins. Their faces looked scary alike. They smiled at me and then hugged Evan.

"Evan! Your home. It's about time Mom and Dad are at it again. They keep yelling even louder every time," The little boy said. As he looked up to him.

"Yeah Evan you're supposed to come right home remember? It was our deal. They scare us when their like that," said the little girl who hugged Evan tighter. "Who's this Evan? Your girlfriend?" she asked as she looks at me.

"Ah no this is Hannah. Hannah this is Claire and Devon my brother and sister," he said.

"Hi," I said to both. Claire came to my side and held my hand and smiled at me. I hope she doesn't notice my scars.

"Your very pretty Hannah. Do you want to play dress up?" she asks. Then she looked at my hand. She touched my scars, I flinched.

"Maybe in a little bit okay Claire? Hannah needs to get settled in," Evan said. Claire looked like she was going to cry as she was looking at my scars.

"Okay. I'll show you my room!" she squeaked.

"Then after hers is mine, 'cause mines better, "Devon said while grabbing my other I don't have scars on that one. . . at least not yet.

"Is not, it's all boys' stuff who likes that?" she says as were walking upstairs.

"Hannah will once she sees my room," he said while sticking his tongue out at Claire. I turn my head and see Evan shrugging at me and mouthing 'Sorry' to me. He walks into the living room where his parents were shouting at each other. All of a sudden they stopped when they saw him. Claire kept pulling me tighter up the stairs. We walk down the long narrow hallway and turn to the left. Claire opens the door and all I notice is pink. Pink is everywhere with flowers painted on her wall. She has her name above her bed. On her bed sheets and comforter is _High School Musical_. Her wall is covered with _High School Musical_ stuff. Posters of Zac Efron and Ashly Tisdale. It was crazy, I needed to get out of here. I can't stand _High School Musical_. Zac Efron is okay. Claire goes into her closet and gets the dolls. Oh no I can't take it anymore I'm afraid of dolls. All because of stupid _Chuckie_. I shudder at the thought. At this moment I wish I could take something sharp and cut myself. I try to act calm when she gives me the Ashley Tisdale one. She gives herself Vanessa Hudgens. After a couple of hours playing with Barbie dolls, Evan knocked on the door. He slowly opened the door and Devon was behind him. Evan shut the door. He sat next to Claire while Devon sat next to me. Evan takes a deep breath and looks at me.

"My parents said you can stay, but since there's no place to sleep besides the couch downstairs, you're going to have to sleep with Claire," he said with a bit of anger.

There is no freaking' way I'm sleeping in this room. If I slept in here I couldn't cut. I have to now!

"Yay! A sleepover." she squeaked and clapped. I give her a fake smile and look at Evan who was watching Claire clapping.

"Hey guys I have an idea!" Evan said. We all look at him waiting. "How 'bout you guys go hide while Hannah and I count and try and find you," he said.

They both scream and get up. They run out the door and close it behind them.

"Sorry," I whisper. He looks up at me shocked at what I said.

"You're sorry? I'm sorry that you have to stay in this room," he waves his hands around. I give a little laugh.

"You could sleep in my room...if you want," he asks.

"Evan...Hannah come find us!" Claire and Devon shouted from where ever they were. We both get up and open the door. Evan gives me this look.

"That would be great..." I answered him and he smiled. I give him a nudge on his elbow and smile. "Come out; come out where ever you are!" I shouted. We heard little giggles and we both smiled at each other. We go deeper into the hallway where there was a door shut and we heard giggling. Evan puts a finger to his mouth and I nod. He opens the door very quickly and we both go 'boo' and Devon and Claire come out from under the bed and while screaming. Evan goes for Claire and I go for Devon. I grab a hold of him and Evan does the same to Claire.

"Hmm what should we do to them Hannah?" Evan asks in a creepy voice. I giggle a little bit.

"Hmm I don't know maybe we could make them eat peas?"I ask. They both gasp and tried to struggle out of our grasp.

"Or maybe we tickle them!" Evan says. Now they both give a good scream and we both lift our arms up and they run out of the room. We chase after them until Evan's parents showed up in the hallway. They both scared us all. We both jump and gasp. The kids get behind us and hide from them. The Mom was very tall and skinny. She had long blonde hair too but it was straight not curly. She had a pale look like a vampire. The Dad was a little shorter than the Mom. Less scary I should say. He had short brown hair and was a little tubby. He had this beard too. I didn't like it, it didn't match to his face. His skin tone was a little darker than his wife's. No wonder the kids were scared of them. The Mom is staring me down. I couldn't keep away from her look. Someone cleared their throat but I don't know who.

"Mom, Dad this is Hannah," Evan said. The Dad looked at Evan and gave him a creepy smile.

"Well I guess she can stay," the Mom said. "Supper is ready come down stairs now." She demanded.

The parents turned around and walked downstairs. And we slowly follow them. The kids are still behind us. We go into the dining room and there is this long table with eight chairs. Two at each end and three on each side. Guess where the parents sit? I did a little chuckle and the parents give me this strange look. They sit at each end and Evan pulls out a sit for me. He sits across from me because Claire wants to sit by me and Devon wants to sit by his big brother. The Mom holds up a ringer type thing and shakes it. Then the maid comes running in with the salads. She asked what I wanted to drink and I said a coke and she ran off. We slowly ate our salads then when we were finished the Mom rang the bell again. The maid comes out and grabs our plates and runs into the kitchen. They must be really rich. The parents fit the part, just not the kids. No one is talking at all. Claire looks up to me every time when the maid comes running back in and out. Evan looks up at me when his Mom rings that stupid bell. Finally we had our real dinner and it was steak. Mine was cooked just right. It tasted so good, I was in heaven. When it came to dessert the maid came in with ice cream in these wine glasses. My ice cream was brown with strawberries in it. So was everyone else's. I ate the ice cream first then the strawberries. Strawberries are my favorite. My Mom and Dad would take me strawberry picking every year. That was so much fun, and now I won't be able to do that now. What is happening to me? Am I some sort of curse? Good thing grandpa wasn't home or else I would have had no where to go. Thank god for Evan's parents to let me stay. But now that I think about it I kind of wish I wasn't. When the parents told us we were dismissed, we walked back upstairs quietly. Claire was holding onto my hand and Evan had Devons. We all went into Evan's room. His room was black. It had posters of AC/DC and Jet. Both great bands. He has good taste. He turned on another light and that made it a lot better. His room was very clean. Just like Claire's. I sat down on Evan's black couch from across his bed. He had two shelves on either side of the bed. One with a lamp on and an alarm clock. And the other just had a couple of books. His closet was closed, and then next to it was a drum set. Wow I wish I knew how to play an instrument. Any who as I sat on his couch Claire and Devon sat next to me. Claire sat on my lap and started petting my hair.

"I love your hair," she says. I smile at her.

"Thank you. I love yours too it's very pretty," I smile. She grins at me too.

"What is up with girls and their hair?" Devon huffs. Evan and I both chuckle at that. I look at the clock and it's already 9:30. Then a knock came upon the door.

"Come in," Evan said.

The maid came in. "Sorry to disturb you, but your parents want you little ones to go to bed." She points at Claire and Devon.

"Ah man," they both groan. They both get up and start walking out.

"Oh wait!" Claire says before she goes out the door. She turns and looks at me. "You're sleeping in my room right, Hannah?"

I bit my lip and took a quick glance at Evan who only shrugged. "I'll be there in a few minutes sweetie."

"Okay," she whispers and yawns. She closes the door behind her and that made Evan and me alone.

"Give her ten minutes and she'll fall right asleep," He said.

"Where am I going to sleep?" I ask.

"On my bed duh,"

"Oh no I can't take your bed, let me sleep on the couch."

"Its fine, I usually sleep on the couch anyways," he shrugs.

"You're just saying that," I hit his arm.

"Yeah I am," he chuckles.

"You can brush your teeth first and then me," he said as he points to his bathroom. I nod and walk in. I close the door and look around. It's all white in here. Very different from his room. I look around in his cabinets then I take a peek in his shower. I see a bar of soap on the wall and Head and Shoulders 2 in 1 shampoo. I go back to the sink and look at the two toothbrushes. I take the white one because it looks like it's never been used before and I'm guessing his is the red one, just because it looks like he needs to replace that one. I grab the white toothbrush and open the cabinet mirror and get the toothpaste out. It's mint flavor, my favorite. I brush my teeth then peek through the door. Evan is sitting on the couch looking at the seat next to him. He looks so depressed. I clear my throat and he jumps up and looks and me.

"Um...what can I wear?" I ask. He nods and opens his closet. He grabs a t-shirt and hands it to me. "Thanks." I close the door. I look at the t-shirt and it's an old AC/DC logo and band picture. It's black of course. I take off my blue jeans and green shirt and put his t-shirt on. It goes below my knees. It's so comfy, I take a sniff of it and it smells really good. It smells like his car and a hint of what ever type of cleaning fabric they use. I look at myself in the mirror before I come out. My hair is very long; it goes at least below my breasts. My face is kind of pale too but not as much as Evan's Mom. My red hair looks like the color of blood. How scary is that? I shudder at that and turn around to open the door. Evan is still sitting on his couch while reading a book. He notices me because the bright light shining through the bathroom made him look up. He stares at me for a minute but then cleared his throat and shook his head. He gets up and walks right in front of me. I move my hand to cover my scars. He looks at me then down at my hand. He slowly reaches toward it and lifts it away from my scars. Oh no. He traces the four lines on my arm. I shiver as his cold finger tip traces them.

"What happened?" he asked never leaving his sight from my scars.

"It takes the pain away." I shrug.

He shakes his head and goes past me into the bathroom. I take a deep breath and look around and see the bed. I move a little to the right and lift the covers. I pull the covers up and lay my head on the pillow. Ah the pillow feels like a cloud. I look up on the ceiling and all there is, is black. The night's sky. The bathroom door came open and Evan was only in boxer's now...black one's. He's a boxer guy! He's goes over to the couch and grabs something from under it. I look up a little to see. It's just a pillow and some sheets. He gets all situated and claps. The light goes off, I gasp in excitement. I never knew clap on lights were still around. I smile and clap. Then the light comes back on. I giggle and Evan moans. I bit my lip and clap again. He's very cranky before bed. I squint my eyes and clap again. He turns his head and his hair flows with him. Wow he's really cute. No, no, no you like Jason remember? Jason!

"Do you need anything?" he growls.

"What got up your ass when you where in the bathroom?" I ask.

"Nothing. Now go to sleep." he muttered. He clapped and turned his head. I turn my head too and close my eyes. I open them and all I see are faces staring back at me, I scream and they all get back and I get up. I blink a few times then rub my eyes. Now that I'm seeing more clearly, I see Luna, Christine, Shane, and Alex. Where's Oliver? I frown but then they all move away and I see Oliver behind them. Luna smiled.

"We thought you would never come back," she said. She holds my hand and we all walk to the fire pit.

"Sorry it took so long," I said. I look over at everyone and I see Shane staring at my legs. I look down and see that I'm still wearing Evan's t-shirt! Oh crap. Shane gives a little smirk look on his face.

"Nice orange panties by the way," he said while winking at me. My mouth dropped, Christine and Oliver hit him on each side of his arms. Luna just gave him a glare and out her arm around my shoulders. I wonder if they all saw my scars. I really hope not. I think that's why Evan was mad at me before we went to bed. It could not have been just because I was having fun with the lights. I shake my head as I saw something very weird. Alex was walking very close to Luna today. Christine kept glaring at Shane with every rude remark. And Oliver...well he's been keeping an eye on me and I've been doing the same. We would smile every time we would look up. He is just so cute I want to make out with him. I wonder if he feels the same. Maybe if he doesn't I could just kiss Evan. Whoa! Me kiss Evan there's no way that's going to happen...I think. Luna gets closer to me and whispers.

"Oliver has been waiting for you to come. He didn't talk to us all day until now. He must really like you."

I turn my head to look at her. "You really think so?"

She nods and sits over by Alex. Christine is fighting with Shane about who knows what. They've been fighting since I got here. Then Oliver gets up and sits next to me. I smile big time and so does he. Twilight just got over and the fire turned on. Oliver took my hand in his and we both got up and walked. I heard someone whistle and figured it was Shane but we both didn't care. We were staring in each other's eyes. We stop at a tree, looking over a little pond. We sit down on the bench, while still holding hands. His eyes never leave mine and I hope they don't.

"I thought you would never come back," he whispered.

"Sorry it took me so long. You can only see me when I'm sleeping," I told him.

"I wish you were here always," he muttered while cupping my cheek.

"Why am I not here always like you?" I asked.

"I wish I knew. Alex has been trying to figure out why, but he cannot find anything."He shook his head.

"Well we can make my stay last," I said while getting up and putting my hand out for him to hold. He looks up at me and smiles. He takes it and we walk back to everyone else. As we walk back everyone starts staring and smiling at us. Shanes mouth flew open and Christine smacked it back up. Luna only giggled and I couldn't help it either. I wonder if these people care that I'm cutting? I mean I know that Luna knows and now that I was lying like that when I came in how did they not notice?

"Ah man you took the hottie!" Shane moaned. Christines mouth was now wide open and she stalked off. "What's wrong with her?" he asked as he points to where she left walking.

"Hmm I wonder why!" I shout and ran after Christine. Luna followed me. We ran after her and we found her crying behind a tremendous tree. We knelt down next to her and I put my hand on her left shoulder.

"I don't know why I'm even crying," Christine sniffed.

"Oh come on Christine we all know you like Shane. And he likes you," Luna said flat out.

"I know. Is it that obvious?" she asks. We both nod. "Oh God and he doesn't even know!" she cried even harder now.

"Oh Christine everything will be okay," I said while patting her shoulder.

"No it won't!" she sniffed again. Then we heard someone clearing their throat and Luna and I look up to see Shane. We give him a glare first but then he gave us a frown. We sighed and got up. "Where are you guys going?" she asked and watched us get up. When she finally realized that Shane standing over us. We walk away giggling and we see the boys sitting with each other talking. I sit on Oliver's lap and Luna sits on Alex's. Oliver puts his arms around my waist and holds me tight. We start laughing and talking. I look behind Luna and Alex and see Christine holding hands with Shane. Shane is blushing big time, so is Christine. Awe they look so cute together. Luna finally notices that I haven't been paying attention and she turns to where I'm looking at. She tilts her head so Alex can see too. Then I start to hear loud music coming from my left ear.

"Oh no!" I moan. Everyone looks at me and frown. Then they realize what's going on and they gave me goodbye. I felt warm lips kiss the back of my neck. Oliver! I can't leave him alone. I open my eyes and gasp for air. I scream when I wake up. Evan jumps off from the couch and races to my side. He puts his arm around my shoulder. My hands cover my five as I start to cry.

"Shh Hannah everything is going to be okay," he repeated over and over. I stop crying and I look over at the clock. It read 6:00 am. Holy crap he gets up this early! What is wrong with him?

"You really get up this early?" I sniff.

He chuckles. "Yeah since I live about half hour away from the school. I kind of have to so I wouldn't be late."

"Huh. Now the question is who gets to take the shower first?" I ask as we both look at the bathroom. We both run up to the door and I'm trying to push him out of the way, but he keeps pulling me back. Were both laughing and I was sometimes screaming. Finally I push him with my leg and he was falling down until he grabbed my leg. I fell down on top of him. My hands were on his chest and we stay quiet for a few seconds. He cleared his throat.

"You can use the bathroom first. I'll be...picking out my clothes," he muttered. We were staring at each other and my face kept going closer to his. He kept looking at my lips and back to my eyes. Then the door flung open and Claire is at the door panting.

"Is everyone alright?" she asks. Then she realizes what she ran into and her mouth drops. She then smiles and winks at her big brother and leaves. We both give a little laugh. Evans arms were wrapped around my waist and for some reason I didn't want him to let go. My hands were still on his chest. I bit my lip and moved my face down to his. Are lips touched? The kiss was amazing I didn't want to stop. He was a better kisser than Jason. It's like when I'm with Evan I completely forget about Jason. His feelings for him have just vanished. Wow I can't believe what I'm actually saying. His lips were as soft as a feather. It was a very gentle kiss until are tongues were on top of one another. His hands were slightly tighter around my waist and my hands were moving to grab his cheeks. We both didn't want to stop. Oh my gosh what about Oliver? I'm kissing Evan and I forgot all about Oliver too. What am I going to do about Oliver? He's going to be crushed. Evans hands move down and both his hands grabbed a hold of my ass. I whimpered and we just kept on kissing. The alarm went off again and I checked the clock. It read 6:15. We were making out for more than ten minutes! Wow that's a record for me. I pout at him and he points to the bathroom.

"Now you go take that shower or else were going to be late!" he demanded. I slowly get up with a grunt and closed the bathroom door behind me. After the time I was in the shower I was wondering what the crap am I going to wear? I can't wear the same clothes over again, that's just gross. Maybe Evan has something. Or maybe I could fit into Claire clothes. Luckily I am skinny so I can fit everything. I got that from my mom. I finished my shower and came out with just a towel on and Evan turned around. He kept staring from my breasts to my legs. Finally he looked up at me.

"What am I going to wear?" I asked. At first he didn't respond but then he blinked and shook his head. I couldn't help but giggle at that.

"Um...I can see what my mom has," he said as he was walking towards the door. I nod and he goes out. I sit down on his bed waiting. I look around and opened his night stand. In there I found a book. It was the one he was reading before we went to bed. I open it up and it looks like his hand writing. I start reading the first page.

October 30th 1995

It's almost Halloween and I'm very excited because it's almost the day of my birthday. My Dad is getting out of jail, seeing me for the first time in a year and a half. I don't blame him for what he did. I did break the plate, but my hands were slippery from the water. He was really drunk too. He's always drunk when either something bad happened at work or if him and Mom would get into an argument because she would be up late and not come home until in the morning and smelling like a men's cologne. One night she didn't come home and Dad blamed it on me, so he only hit me a few times. Sometimes it gets worse so I was lucky that time. After I broke the plate he got really mad. He started slapping my cheek. Then Mom came home and she screamed when she saw what he was doing. She started hitting him...bad mistake. He started hitting her over and over again. Until she wasn't getting up and Dad took me into my room and started beating me repeatedly. I almost died that night if it weren't for Mom getting up and calling the police. After that Mom got a divorce from him. And the man she was seeing was actually really nice. He was the one who gave me this journal to put in all of my thoughts and my past to put everything in the journal so then I would never imagine them again. It only took me two years to start writing things down. I thought that if this was going to be my first journal entry that it should be about how I got the journal in the first place.

I almost started to cry when I heard Evan's voice. He was talking to Claire. I closed the book quickly and put it back in the night stand. He slowly opened the door and came in. He handed me a pair of blue jeans and one of her black tops. I smiled nervously, and he raised one eyebrow and then I went back into the bathroom. I quickly changed and the pants of course were too long. So I rolled the up an until they didn't cover my feet. The black shirt was gorgeous. I would have never picked this out for myself. It's kind of low cut but it'll have to deal. I open the door and there's Evan sitting on his couch, reading his journal. I take a big gulp and walked over to him. I sat down next to him. He shakes his head and closes his journal and goes into the bathroom. We have forty-five minutes before we leave for school. I'm all nervous. What if he knows I read his journal? Well I only read the first page but it was very personal. Probably no one knows that about him but his Mom and Stepdad. My hair is almost dried when Evan came out wearing a towel around his waist. God he looked so good dripping wet. I bit my lip and he walked over to his closet to grab the clothes he was going to wear. He went back into the bathroom. I wait but he's taking too long. We now have a half an hour to leave, so I go downstairs to the kitchen. The maid has already made breakfast. Claire and Devon greet me when I grabbed a plate. I grab a spoonful of scrambled eggs and bacon.

"Um...where can I get a glass of milk?" I ask. Claire gets up and gets the maid. The maid comes running in and she rushes to get a glass and gets the milk out of the fridge. She makes me a glass and then leaves the kitchen out of sight. I sit down and start to eat when Evan makes himself a plate. Claire starts to giggle when he sits across from me. I know I'm blushing right now I can feel the heat rushing to my cheeks. Evan is just poking at his eggs.

"Did you have a good sleep Hannah?" Devon asks as he takes a bite of his scrambled eggs. I swallow what I had in my mouth before I spoke. And did a little choke.

"Yep sure did," I gulped.

"Yeah she had a great morning too," Claire giggled. Evan kicked her under the table. "Ouch!" He gave her a glare and she stuck her tongue out.

It was silence for now on then. We drove off to school and went into study hall. Good thing too because I didn't do any of my homework. Evan didn't sit by me. That made me a little upset. Okay I know he knows I read his journal. As I was starting to write some girl in front of me turned and looked at me. She had long blonde hair with brown eyes. She was very skinny. She was on the Varsity cheerleader squad, also she was very popular. She was wearing her Varsity jacket and blue jeans. She had on this pink see through shirt. Of course there was a white tank top underneath. I totally forgot her name too.

"Hi I'm Rachel, your Hannah right?" she asked me. I just did one nod. "Love that top on you. Where'd you get it?"

"I borrowed it," I mumbled.

"Oh well it looks very cute. Say you want to sit with me at lunch today?" she asked as she tilts her head.

"Um... I guess so," I said. Rachel had this huge smile on her face. I swear the edges of her mouth were touching her eyes. I gave a nervous have smile and she started talking to me about everything she does. I didn't really pay attention I was mainly thinking about Evan. Poor Evan, I want him to talk to me. I need to talk to him. Or kiss him. He was a really great kisser. I love his kiss. I want him to kiss me again. Instead I heard Rachel talking about how she bought these new pair of jeans at _American eagle_ and then this really ugly girl bought the same pair. So she took that pair back and bought darker ones. There actually the ones she's wearing now. They don't look that bad actually. I might get a pair. I was so happy when the bell rang. The hours ran by so fast that it was already lunch. When I got to my locker Rachel was already waiting for me. She shut my locker for me and she put her arm around mine and we started walking down the halls. When we turned the corner I noticed Lexi's bleach blonde hair and Evan in the corner. I smile at them but only Lexi smiles and waves. Evan just looks up for a second and looks back down at his food.

"Why are you waving at them?" Rachel scowls.

"They're my friends," I murmured.

"Now that your hanging out with me, you can't even look at them," she said as she nods her head towards their direction. I immediately take my arm away from her and shake my head.

"You cannot tell me who to hang out with. They are my friends. So I'm sorry if you can't handle that!" I yelled. Now people were staring and clapping. I turned around and walked back to Lexi and Evan. I'm about two feet next to Lexi. She looks up and stares for a minute. She smiles then and I know I'm welcome. Well at least to Lexi anyways. I sit down next to Lexi and she rambles on about what just happened. I kept getting glances from Evan. I just keep staring at him, but every once in a while I would be looking at Lexi so then she'll know that I'm paying attention. He didn't say anything to me. Lunch was over and then before I knew it school was out. I wonder if Grandpa is picking me up. Huh or maybe he forgot. Evan passes by me and starts walking to his car. Talk to him you big coward. I wave my hand in the air.

"Evan!" I shout. He turns around and noticed that it was just me. So he turned around and kept walking to his car. I groaned and ran after him. He arrived at his car when I caught up to him. I went to his driver's side and forced him to turn around to look at him. "Why won't you talk to me damn it!" I growled.

"Did you like it?" he asked. I tilt my head and I'm not understanding his question. "Did you like what I wrote?" Oh now I know. He knew I read his journal.

"Evan I'm sorry alright, I was really bored waiting in your room okay? So I read the first page-" I rambled.

'The most private one at that!" he finished.

"I'm sorry. I'm really truly sorry," I kept apologizing. He still acted like he didn't hear me. He tried to open his car door but I slid my way in between him and the car door. Thank god I'm skinny or else that would not have been easy. "I'm sorry. Looks like we both have secrets we don't want to tell" I whispered. I noticed Evan's head looks down at me and opened his mouth to say something but then I heard horns honking over us. I looked over and saw my friends. I groaned and Evan just shrugged. The car stopped right behind Evan's so now he can't get out. Zooey, Jasibel, Kendra, and Hailey all came out. Last one was Jason. They all came running towards me and gave me a huge hug. I looked over at Evan but he had his head down and was being pushed out of the way. Jason came by my side and kissed my cheek. I looked at Zooey but she was looking at Jason. Was she jealous?

"How are you?" Jason asked. I looked up and him and smiled.

"Better," I said. He smiles back and he kissed me.

"Jason! We must be going soon," Zooey blurted out.

"Why?" he asked as we stopped kissing.

"Homecoming court meeting in about one hour duh," she said.

"Oh," he looked down. I looked at him but him wasn't saying anything.

"Jason and I are homecoming King and Queen," Zooey bragged.

"Sorry Hannah," Kendra whispered.

"Don't be sorry. Why should you be sorry?" I asked. No one was looking at me now. Zooey stared me down. I let go of Jason and took a couple steps back. "Jason?" I whispered. He still looked down at the ground.

"Jason and I are together!" Zooey blurted out." He couldn't be with a cutter anymore!" I stare at her with this ashamed look. I kept shaking my head.

"God Zooey. Don't be a bitch about it," Hailey shouted. Jasibel and Kendra had sad faces on. They ran over to me and out their arms around me. Zooey was alone looking at Jason. Jason pursed his lips and walked over to her.

"C-come on girls lets go," Zooey stuttered. Jasibel and Kendra followed Zooey and Hailey stayed behind. I saw her face and I just nodded and she did too in response and she left. Jason was standing where Zooey was with his hands in his pockets. He started to open his mouth and say something but Zooey called his name and he turned around and got in the car. They left. I just stared at where the car was. I jumped because someone put their hand on my shoulder and I turned around. It was Evan. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and his went around my waist.

"Come on I'll take you home," he whispered.

"Where's home?" I asked as he puts me in his car. He ignores my question and drove off. I opened my eyes and noticed that we were at his house. Evan opened the door for me and helped me out. He opened the front door when Claire and Devon raced out and hugged me.

"Oh Hannah we've missed you," They both said. I knelt down and hugged them.

"Awe I missed you too guys," I muttered.

"Alright guys Hannah and I have a lot of homework. So let us finish and we'll play later okay?" Evan asked.

"Yes Evan," they both sang. They giggled when Evan helped me up and walked me to his room. I went over and plopped on Evan's couch. Evan went over and turned the light on. He closed his door and grabbed our backpacks over to where I was.

"Evan..." I whispered. "Can I just sleep for a little while?" He stopped getting his and my stuff out and looked up at me. He nodded and slowly got up. I grabbed his hand. I pulled him back on the couch. "Don't go." He sat back down and lay behind me. I laid in front of him and he wrapped his arm around my stomach. I held his hand and closed my eyes. I woke up sitting on Oliver's lap. He smiled and so did I. For some reason I don't get butterflies in my stomach anymore. I only get them from Evan. I turn and see Luna making out with Alex so I turn again and see Christine making out with Shane. Oh jeez I feel really bad for Oliver. No wonder he's never around. Don't they know I'm back yet? I cleared my throat but they were all still making out. I pretended like I was choking and finally they stopped and looked at me. They grinned and continued to make out. Okay this is making me depressed. Oliver entwined my fingers with his and I looked at him. I laid my head under his neck and he stroked my hair. As soon as I closed my eyes I heard someone scream. I jolt up and looked around. Up to Christine is crying hysterically. I run over to her and wrap my arms around her. Wait! Where's Shane? He was just here, Christine was just sitting on his lamp and now she's sitting on the wet ground, Everyone notices and starts looking around.

"Where..." Christine was trying to say but her voice is really shaky. "Where is...is Shane?" she stammered.

"We'll find him don't worry," I whispered as I held her tightly. Her hands were shaking. Her entire body was shaking. Half hour later Luna, Oliver and Alex came back with their heads down. When they reached us Christine stood up.

"Did you find him?" She asks. She looked at all three at them one at a time.

"I'm-" Oliver was trying to say before Christine interrupted.

"Nooooooo," she cried out and her knees fell to the ground. Luna started crying and Alex wrapped his arms around her. I went down with Christine and held her. Oliver went next to me and rubbed his hand up and down my arm. After a while Christine stopped crying and I was trying to figure out what this place is. Then I think I finally have an idea.

"Oliver before you arrived here what were you doing?" I asked. He looked up at me like I was a crazy person but he just shrugged.

"I was driving home from work and after that I saw bright white lights," he said. Bright white lights, he was in a car accident. Then he came here right after.

"How long have you been here?" I asked.

"Um...maybe a little over a year now." He shook his head.

"What about you guys what were you doing before you came here?" I asked Christine, Luna and Alex.

Christine said that she was walking down the stairs from her building that she worked at and she tripped and fell down. Landed on her head pretty hard. She couldn't remember anything after that. For Alex it was really sad. He was with his family and they were all in one car driving to California for a trip to see their Grandparents. But the car flipped over because this jackass was driving on the wrong side and he remembered seeing his parents. Right after the car was flipped his parents were in the worst condition he could ever imagined. But after that he said he didn't remember anything either. Luna couldn't remember anything at all. Just that she's been sick all her life but when she's here she's the best that she ever felt in her entire life. I still don't know why I keep coming here when I fall asleep. But I have a feeling of why their all here. I need to go back now. I need to go to the hospital. I close my eyes and open them again. I was in Evan's room. I get up right away and grab my jacket. Evan slowly sits up and rubs his eyes.

"Where are you going?" He asked.

"We need to go to the hospital now!" I demanded. He tilts his head to the side and shakes his head. "Fine I'll go by myself". I rush to the door but Evan runs over to me and blocks it. I groan and give him a stare. He folds his arms across his chest.

"Why do _we _need to go to the hospital?" he asked.

"My friends are in there!" I shouted. Then Evan's hands drop and he grabs his jacket. We ran out the door and go into his car. He drove off full speed. As we were driving Evan looked at me with one eye brow pushed up. We were at a red light so I told him everything that has happened to me ever since my parents have died. His face expression never changed. His face was just calm, cool, and collected. When I was finished finally the light turned green and we didn't talk for the rest of the way there. We parked in the visitors parking lot and ran to the elevator. Level fifteen is the Coma floor. I push button fifteen and wait. Evan was just in the corner looking up at the numbers when we go up a level. Then he sat down in the corner. His legs are pushed up against his chest and he starts rocking and humming to himself. I take a few steps toward him and knelt down. I slowly out a hand on his arm and he jolted up and looked at me.

"Are you okay Evan?" I asked.

"Last time I was here," he started to say but he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. " My Dad had to come here before he went to jail. Mom beat him up so hard before he started hitting her again. I had to come and say goodbye to him. Mom was in the next room getting fixed. That night as I was sleeping in Mom's room the door slowly opened. I just thought it was the nurse checking up on her again. But it wasn't. It was Dad, he came in and grabbed the pillow from Mom's bed. He lifted it up and started to kill her. I get up and jump on him. I was giving him a few punches of my own when he punched me so hard I was out cold. Luckily right after that the nurse came in and she screamed. Mom made it out, but every night she has nightmares of Dad coming in her bedroom and killing her. My stepdad really does not know what happened. I hope that Mom will tell him what happened and so then I wouldn't make an excuse every time she has a bad dream."

"Oh Evan I'm so sorry," I said while putting my arms around him. As we were holding each other the elevator rang and the doors opened. We get up and start trying to find the main office. We find a lady wearing a pink scrub on. She had her brown long hair in a hair tie. Around her papers stacked. I rang the bell and she popped her head up.

"What can I do for you Miss?" she asked as she's chewing gum.

"Um...I was wondering if the names Luna, Oliver, Christine, and Alex are in this level?" I asked.

The nurse blew a huge bubble and looked through her files. "Are you family to them?" she asked me.

"No," I shook my head. "I can help them." The nurse gives me a good hard look and just shrugs.

"Okay I'll let you in. There all next to each other room 401,402,403, and 404. Down that hall to your left. Oh and if your wondering about Shane he just woke up from Acoma. He's been that way for a couple years. We never thought he would wake up. After what happened to him," She said while shaking her head.

"Where is he?" I asked.

"He's in the same room as Christina," she said. Huh go figure.

"Thank you," I breathed as I slammed my hands on the counter and ran to room 401. I ran into a couple of white beds and a few nurses who gasped. I did not care I just kept on running. I looked at the rooms 398, 399, 400. Finally I reached 401. I took a deep breath and opened the door. My hand covered my mouth as I saw Luna strapped to the bed. There were needles poking in her arms. She had one of those breather things to help. She has cuts all over her face. Her legs are in casts. I noticed around her bed were get well cards and balloons. There was vases of flowers everywhere. I slowly walked to her bedside. There already was a chair next to her so I took it. My shaky hand reached out towards her scratched up hand. I carefully held it in mine. Evan put his hand on my shoulder as I started to cry. She looks even more beautiful in person. Every time the machine beeped the breather would release to give her air. The TV was on. It had America's Next Top Model. Luna told me that was her favorite show. I started crying even more when saw that. Now I have no idea what to do.

"Luna," I sniffed. "Luna it's me Hannah. I'm here". All of a sudden her eye twitched. I looked up and started talking some more. "Luna wake up, please wake up. Alex is waiting for you to wake up. So you can wake him up. Luna I need you," I cried. Evan put his arm around me and put his lips to my ear.

"Maybe we should try someone else," he whispered. I nodded and got up. Evan held me as we walked into the next room. I opened the door and saw Christine. Her beautiful hair was laying on the side of her face. Her skin was as pale as a vampire. She didn't look as badly hurt as Luna but it still made me tear up. I walked shakily towards her but then I her my name in a whisper. I gasp and turned around. It was Shane. He was sitting up in his bed. His blonde shaggy hair was actually brushed for once. His brown eyes were happy when he saw me. I smiled and walked over to him. I gave him a huge hug and he gave me one right back. I started crying even more because last time I saw him was when he was making out with Christine but when he disappeared. We slowly pulled away from each other and looked at Christine.

"They say that she might never wake up," Shane whispered. I looked at him in disbelief. He just shrugged and played with his blanket.

"Have you tried talking to her?" I asked.

"I tried," he shook his head. "Nothing is happening."

"Shane have you tried physical contact?" I asked. His head jolted up and wided his eyes. "Not in that way."

"No I haven't," he shook his head again.

"Try again," I nodded.

He nodded too and slowly got up, Evan and I helped him up and walked him over to Christine. He sat down in the brown chair next to her and cupped her pale cheek. His lips started to quiver when he touched her. His eyes were getting all watery. I put my hand to my mouth so I wouldn't cry. Evan went to my side and put his arm around my waist. Shane moved his hand down to her arm and it stopped at her hand. He lightly picked it up and kissed it. At that kiss Christine's left eye twitched. He smiled and looked at me. My mouth dropped and looked at him. Shane held her hand to his chest.

"Christine," he sniffed. "Sweet heart, it's me Shane. I miss you, wake up for me and we can be together. I miss you fighting with me, you hitting me when I knew that you meant to kiss me. Every time I made a comment about a girl it was always meant to be about you. I've always loved you since the first time I laid eyes on you. I will always love you."

I hid my head in Evan's chest and he wrapped his arms around me as I cried. Shane bent down and kissed her pink lips. Just then both of her eyes twiched. They kept moving. I walk over to Shane and he watches her carefully. He goes down and cups her cheek.

"Christine sweet heart please wake up... for me," Shane whispered. Her eyes were moving inside her eyelids. Finally they were slowly opening. She blinked a few times and then they were opened. Shane and I both smiled. Shane sniffed and stroked her cheek. "Hey," he whispered. Christine smiled and looked at me.

"H-Hannah," she stammered and then looked at Shane. "S-Shane where did you go?" she asked.

"I guess I woke up," he shrugged and smiled. "I'm here now with you."

"Don't ever leave again," she whispered.

He chuckled. "Never."

I hugged them both and went into the next room. Oliver. He too had needles up his arms. He had a scar going down his face. I walked towards him when I noticed that there was an empty bed across from him. A nurse came in to do a checkup. I raised my hand.

"Excuse me," the nurse looked at me. "Who used to sleep in that bed?" I asked.

"Oh poor dear. His name was Alex Flexing he died this morning. Good thing his father went to jail!" she growled. Then she left after checking Oliver's monitor. I dropped to the chair next to Oliver's bed. Oh no Alex. What am I going to tell Luna when she wakes up? Or if she wakes up. No she will wake up I just know it. Evan rested his hand on my shoulder. I covered his hand with mine. I reached over to Oliver's hand and brushed it softly. Then the door quickly opened and my head jolted right up and so did Evan's. There was a man with short brown hair. He had on a blue shirt with blue jeans. He had on these big glasses. Behind him was a lady. She was wearing a long red dress and had on a white fur coat. Her hair was very long and curly. She had the brightest red lip stick color on her lips. Her nose reminded me of Oliver's. The guy's eye color reminds me of Oliver too. Behind the woman were twin girls. They had little white dresses on with pink flowers in their curly brown hair. They had blue matching jackets on. They rushed over to Oliver's bed side. Then after they came in a doctor came in with a nurse. My breathing started to go faster. I could feel Evan's grip on my shoulder go even tighter. This must be Oliver's family. The doctor went next to his mother and father and he started talking.

"Oliver is not doing good. You need to talk to him. Talking helps," he said.

"We talk to him all the time and nothing is working!" Oliver's mother cried. I started crying after that.

"Try again and if that does not work then. . . were going to have to turn off the machine," the doctor said as he put his head down. He slowly walked out still shaking his head. The family did not even realize I was there until one of the twins saw me.

"Hey who are you?" One of the twins asked.

"I'm Hannah Oliver's friend," I teared up.

"Funny I don't remember a Hannah being one of Oliver's friends," his father said.

"I was new," I mumbled.

"Oh well that explains it. He was very nice to everyone," his mother whispered.

"I'm sorry to ask but how long has it been." I asked. His father looked at me with the weirdest look.

"He's been here since last Christmas. He was driving home after work." My mouth dropped at that. Working on Christmas?" His boss made him work. As he was driving home he was at a stop light when a car kept going and then bam! he hit Oliver. The driver was drunk and he did not survive," he growled.

"Oh my gosh I'm so sorry," I whispered. I covered my mouth in shock.

"Were you. . . Oliver's girlfriend?" one of the twins asked.

I could feel my cheeks burning up. The twins both giggled.

"Um. . . Kind of," I spat out. Evan's grip loosened.

"Oh did you love my brother?" she asked.

"I did as a really good friend," I whispered as I reached for his hand again. I slowly got up and walked to the door. My small hand grabbed the door knob. "I'll leave you alone with him."

"Thank you," his mother breathed.

"Please do not turn off the machine. I have faith in him. He will wake up," I said as I shut the door. Evan put his arm around my waist as we walked back into Luna's room. When I opened the door I saw Shane there with Christine in a wheel chair. They looked up at me and frowned.

"How's Oliver?" Shane asked.

"Not good. They might turn off the machine if he doesn't wake up soon," I said while shaking my head. Christine gasped and Shane put his hand on her shoulder. Shane and Christine looked at Evan like a stranger. He looked at me. "Oh sorry this is Evan, Evan this is Christine and Shane the people I told you about."

"Nice to meet you," said Christine. Evan just nodded.

"Yeah same here," said Shane. "Is this guy Evan the reason why you leave our world every now and then?" he asked. My mouth dropped and Christine was shocked that he asked that too. I waved my hands in surrender.

"No, no, no I had no choice of when I could leave or not." I said. "And if he was part of it, it would be none of your business!"

"You left Oliver alone while you went back to 'earth' so you could hang out with this Evan guy!" Shane said while getting a little louder.

"I'm sorry I left Oliver I had no choice. The first couple of times I came into the new world I never wanted to leave I swear!" I shook my head. Evan put his hands on both of my shoulders. "I got close to someone else in real time. I can't change my feelings. I used to like Oliver a lot okay? But now these feelings for Evan are never going away."

"That's. . . That's just bullshit!" Shane shouted while slamming his fist onto Luna's tray. Christine and I both flinched.

"Shane sweetie Hannah can't hide her true feelings just like us. Give her a break," Christine tried to calm him down.

"Look!" I squeaked. I pointed to Luna and they all looked at her. Her eyes were moving around just like Christine. Her fingers started to twitch. I got closer to her and held her hand. Shane was right up next to me. "Luna?" I whispered. Her eyes kept moving. It's like she's having a bad dream or something. Finally she gasped and jolted right up. We all jumped and took a step back. She looked up and looked at all of us one by one.

"Alex!" she gasped. We all look at each other and frowned. She put her head back. "Nooooo!" she cried. We ran to her and held her close. Evan just stayed in the corner. "Wait what about Oliver?" we all let go and stared at her. Then Shane and Christine waited for me to respond. I put my hand on her shoulder. Her lips she already started to quiver.

"His family might turn the machine off. He's not looking so good Luna I'm sorry," I muttered.

"Oh no!" she groaned. "Hey, who's that?" she asked while pointing to the corner where Evan was.

"Oh this is Evan, Evan this is Luna." I said. He came closer and his eyes were wide open. Luna flinched.

"Lexi?!" he breathed.

"No my name is Luna," she corrected.

"Well there's this girl at our school who looks just like you actually," I nodded.

"Oh. . . cool," she said sarcastically. There was an awkward silence when the nurse came in. She jumped when she saw Luna sitting up. Luna, Christine, and I all giggled and the boys just chuckled.

"This has just been an exciting day!" she squeaked. "Everyone who we thought would never wake up has . . . well except for Oliver and Alex-" she started to say something else but the door opened again. There was a long pole with a bag of water hanging from it. It dragged a little bit till we saw the person. We all gasped and had our mouths open.

"Oliver!" we all squeaked. He smiled and limped over to us. He looked really good even in just that long white and blue polka dot robe. He limped over to me and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. Shane was shaking his head and Christine went over to Shane so he won't get mad. Evan was just standing there next to Luna.

"Are you okay? Do you want to sit down? You need anything?" I ask d nervously. He just kept smiling at me. Shane walked over to us and he put one hand on Oliver's shoulder. I shook my head at Shane. I know he's going to do something stupid.

"Man I'm glad you awake," Shane was saying. "'Cause Hannah has something to say. . . Right Hannah?" he narrowed his eyes at me waiting for my answer. Oliver raises one eye brow waiting for me. My mouth quivers and I look at Evan who he too is waiting. I watch Evan a little more than I should and my eyes start to tear up. He crosses his arms over his chest. I turn my head to look at Oliver and he looks at Evan. Then back at me and it's like he already knows what I'm about to say. He slowly shakes his head and then backs up. Shane narrows his eyes at me and I back up too. I mouth him I'm sorry and he still shakes his head repeatedly. I run out of the room and run towards the elevator. I push the button that closes the door repeatedly until the door closes. Thank God no one is in here. I went into the left corner and slid down to the floor. I put my knees up to my chest and started crying. As I was crying I really wish I had a sharp object. I am at a hospital after all. I get up and open the elevator door. I quickly look around. No one is on this floor. Huh weird. I look around and find a scapula. I grab it and find an empty room. Luckily no one is on the floor. Looks like it's been a banded for a long time. I go sit in the corner and get realized. I take a deep breath and think about what I'm doing. I start to cry, while thinking about Oliver and Evan. Jeez I've been crying a lot lately. Maybe I should just get rid of guys. I mean Evan every time I'm around him my stomach gets in knots and forgot how to talk. When I'm with Oliver he just makes me smile, and makes me feel. . . safe. Evan is caring and loving I bet Oliver is like that too but it's different for Evan. He takes care of his brother and sister because his parents fight all the time. Oliver has twin sisters and a mother and a father who probably doesn't spend enough time with them. It's like they just realized that something happened to their son and they feel awful especially the mom. Poor Evan has had it rough just like me. Oliver is sweet and kind but when I kissed Evan it was. . . magical. It was like I was flying on a magic carpet. I don't want to be such a Debbie Downer anymore. Why can't I just make up my mind? Oliver makes me smile but Evan makes me feel complete. Maybe I should just forget about guys completely and go live with Grandpa. Oh no Grandpa! He doesn't even know where I am right now. How in the hell am I going to explain why I even came to the hospital in the first place? I'm so dead. Maybe Grandpa won't even care. Ugh stupid Shane! jeez why did he have to do that? I wanted to tell Oliver in my own time. I wasn't ready to give up Oliver. I knew he would hate me when I told him I had feelings for another guy. I hope soon that he will think it through and forgive me. I can't stop liking someone. I tried with Evan and he can't get out of my head. Especially that kiss. That amazingly wonderful kiss. I hope that we will have another amazingly kiss even better than the first. I take another deep breath and slowly put the scapula on my wrist. As I'm looking at m arm I noticed that I have six scars on my left arm. I should probably start on the other arm. I will be harder since I'm right handed. So I put the scapula in my left hand and put the sharp end on my wrist. I close my eyes and begin the pain. I hiss but it doesn't hurt as much anymore because I'm so used to it. The blood starts to poor out. Too bad I didn't get a towel. I don't like to make a mess. Oh well. It's like anyone is in here. Never mind I lied. I hear Shane's voice coming from the elevator. Oh shit! I can't make him see me like this. I can see him looking around on the floor. Good thing I'm in the corner. I hear him call my name again and again. My blood just keeps pouring out of my wrist. I try to get up but I tripped over my own shoes. I give out a little moan and Shane found me.

"What the fuck are you doing?' he shouted.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" I asked while getting up and showing him my blood pouring out.

"Hannah why do you do this?" he asked as he helps me.

"It takes the pain away," I shrugged.

"Please stop you know what could happen if you cut too deep?" he asked.

"Maybe that's what I've been trying to do." I muttered. But I've always failed.

"Hannah-" he started to say.

We were trying to look for a towel and some Band-Aids. Finally in a dirty white cabinet we found in the bathroom we found some. Shane patched me up and took me to the elevator. We weren't standing near each other. He looked at me but I shook my head.

"Please don't tell them. I don't want to hurt them anymore," I whispered. He stared at me for a minute but then shook his head.

"Luna wants to talk to you," he breathed.

"Why?" I asked flatly.

"Because she has something to ask you," he breathed again.

"Can't you just ask me?" I asked with my head tilted one way. "I really can't talk to anyone I'm very upset!' I said while wiping my face to clear the tears away.

"I'm sorry for what I did. It's just Oliver is my friend and he needs to know the truth," he said.

"I was going to tell him later on when he was a little better. I didn't want to hurt him even more," I grumbled.

"Yeah that was my bad again okay? Now let's hurry!" We ran into Luna's room where I found Christine sitting on the chair next to her and Oliver on the other side. Evan slowly walked up and stood next to Oliver. God they look so much alike. Evan is so beautiful standing there like that. With his arms across his chest, you can see his muscles coming out. I shake my head and look at Luna. Christine gets up so I can sit next to her. I take a hold of Luna's hand and she gives me a weak smile. She looked down at my hands and noticed the fresh scars. She shook her head.

"Why? Why do you do this?, "she whispered as she touches my scars. I flinch and look down.

"It takes the pain away. Now what did you want from me?" I scowled. She coughed.

"Turn off the machine," she nodded. I was in shock. I didn't know what to say. I could not turn off the machine. Everyone gasped when she said that. They all turned their heads at me for an answer. My face was as still as a pole. Her eyes were looking right at mine. I couldn't pull away from them. I jumped at the touch of something from my shoulder. I turned around and it was Evan. He gave me his warm eyes. I smiled and so did he. I cleared my throat and turned to face Luna.

"No," I said flatly. Her mouth opened and I just looked at her.

"You said you would do anything for me. You said!" she complained. Her hands were in forms of fists and banging on the bed. Oliver went over to her. He held onto her hands. I looked at Oliver and smiled at him for a thank you and he just nodded back. "You said!" she repeated but a little more aggressively.

"I can't," I said while shaking my head. "I won't!"

She crossed her arms and turned her head. "Some best friend you are," she mumbled.

My mouth dropped. I can't believe her! "I'm sorry if I don't want you to die okay?! Is that such a crime?"

She turned her head to look at me and I could see tears almost coming down. "I'm sorry Hannah I'm just so miserable you know? I hate these needles being up my arms. I feel so weak. It's hard for me to breathe sometimes. I'm just really tired." Oliver brushed his hand against the back of her hair to calm her down.

"But you will get better. I promise," I did too.

"Hannah I feel so weak though. I can't just cut myself to take the pain away," she shook her head.

"There are people hear to make the pain go away. To help you get better," I said.

"Please, Hannah."

I shook my head. "No I won't."

"Then please leave," she said while her eyes were closed. Like she was ashamed of me.

"Luna no I won't. You have friends here who love you. They to do not want me to turn off the machine. We all love you and care for you. So I am sorry to disappoint you but I'm not leaving." I said while shaking my head. Christine and Shane came from behind me and were both nodding in agreement. Oliver dragged his wheel thing and came close to her on the other side. And rested his immense hand on her shoulder. Evan came and stood next to me. She looked at all of us and tears were slowly falling down her face.

"I'm sorry you guys," she cried.

We all go to her and hug her but very carefully. We don't want to break her. She looks so fragile. She looks up at us.

"I think I want to take a nap," she whispers. We all nod and give her a kiss on her forehead and go into the waiting room. It was all just us in there. Christine and Shane sit next to the door. Oliver is sitting next to Shane. And I'm sitting away from them in the corner. Evan sits across from me and is watching me. Just like Oliver. They think I'm going to go cut myself. But I'm not, I don't do it around people. Except Shane, but not anymore. I'll find a better spot where there is no one. My arms and legs are shaking uncontrollably. I need to cut now. All of this sadness is making me want to cut. Ugh need to go now. I get up right away and start heading towards the door. But Shane gets up and runs after me and pushes me to sit back down. His hands pin mine to the chair and Oliver and Evan sit on either sides of me. I look up right at Shane.

"Where do you think you're going?" Shane growls.

"Bathroom," I growl back.

"Christine will go with you then," he said.

"I don't need a chaperone," I hiss.

"Yes you do," Shane mutters.

"Fine, Christine let's go." I say while getting up. Shane lets go and looks at Christine. She nods at him and she grabs my arm. I cannot believe this! I'm not fucking three years old and need a chaperone to take me to the bathroom. We arrive at the bathroom. And she walks in with me. She even goes in the stall with me! Jesus.

"Christine you don't need to watch me pee," I huffed.

"Apparently I do," she snapped.

What is going on with me? How did I get to be so mean? Why am I like this now? These are my friends. I shouldn't be mean to them.

"I'm sorry Christine I really am," I whispered.

"It's okay. We're all just worried that one day when your cutting yourself you could hit a vain and die." she said.

"It's not like I meant to do it honest," I said.

"No one ever does," she whispered. Were quiet from then on. We reach back to the waiting room where the men stood up and I walked back to my corner. Evan still across from me and Oliver still sitting next to Shane. I cross my arms in my chair and scowl. They are all looking at me. I lift up my wrists and showed them off to them.

"I didn't cut myself! There were no sharp objects in their to do it anyways," I huffed.

They stopped looking at me and I looked at the wall to my left. As I stare at the wall my eyes slowly start to close. I rest my head against my hand and close my eyes. I woke up with no dream. Because now my dream is a reality. As I woke up I noticed that my head was in Evan's arms. He moved over next to me. He too is sleeping. I glance around and noticed that everyone was sleeping. Maybe I should just go back to sleep. But I want to see how Luna is doing. I slowly get up not trying to wake up Evan. I tiptoe out and go in Luna's room. I see her watching tv. I sit next to her as she laughs at the guy getting hit with a ball.

"How are you feeling?" I ask. She doesn't even look at me.

"Okay, I guess." she mumbled.

"Please don't hate me," I pleaded.

"I don't hate you Hannah," she said.

"Well your acting like it," I snapped.

"I'm sorry. It's just I'm upset about Alex. But then I'm that I can maybe be with Oliver. Since you have Evan. I've always had a crush on Oliver and I think he had a crush on me but I didn't believe it anymore when you walked into the picture," she babbled.

"Well I don't even know if I have Evan anymore," I said while shaking my head.

"Oh he loves you Hannah don't worry," she smiled.

"Really? How do you know?" I said.

"The way he looks at you. He looks at you like your the ice cream and he's the spoon," she sighs.

"Wow," I breathed.

"Yeah I know. I wish Oliver looked at me like that. But he loves you too," she mumbles.

"No way. He looks at you differently now. After the whole Evan thing he's been looking at you at an entire new way. Like he finally realized that it's you he would rather be with. Not me," I said while shaking my head.

"Huh, I need to look out more carefully." She says. We both giggle. Then it turned out to be a laugh fest. All of a sudden everyone came into the room. We both look at them and we continue to laugh. Christine smiles at us and walks towards us. We tell her what we were talking about in a whisper tone and she starts to laugh too. The guys look at us all weird and then looked at themselves. They all shrug at each other and came walking towards us. Evan at my side, Shane at Christine's side, and Oliver at Luna's side. He bent down and kissed her on the lips. Christine and I both start laughing. And Luna couldn't help it either. When Oliver was done kissing she continued to laugh. Finally we all calmed down and stared at each other. I do not know if I will ever stop cutting. But right now I know I don't want to. Being with people who love me and care for me, it just feels right. Then we heard screaming coming from the elevators. Evan grabs a hold of me and takes us into the corner of the room. Shane helps Oliver walk to the corner with us. Christine helped Luna up and carrying her to where we were. We all hide behind a door in the room, and we could hear gun shots and screaming. I flinched every time I heard one. Evan held me in his arms very protectively. Now I really need to have something sharp. The gun shots are coming closer. I heard someone yell from the next room. It sounded like my grandpa. I slowly get up but Evan would not let me go.

"Hannah! where are you?" my grandpa shouts.

I slowly start to open my mouth but Evan covers it.

"Hannah I know you're in hear. I'm sorry for what I've done. I did not mean for it to go so far. But these pills that were supposed to make me better have not. They've made me crazy. Help me Hannah!" he cried out.

What has he done? Was he the one whole killed my parents and grandma? No way could he have done those things. I slowly get up and try again. I shoved Evan off of my arms. I walk through everyone and I slowly walk towards the door. I take a deep breath and look out. And there I see my grandpa. He's wearing his favorite blue button up shirt with tan pants. I didn't even notice that he had a bald spot on top of his head. Around the bald spot is his shiny white hair. Why is he doing this? He has something strapped around his body. He turns around as I did a little cough. He gives me this grin and slowly limps towards me. Now he's just a couple inches away from me. My fingers begin to shake. I look into the room where I used to be. Where I should have stayed. Because now I know what's around his body. It's a bomb. My mouth quivers and I could feel tears were going to start coming down my face.

"I'm sorry for the things I did sweetie," my grandpa apologizes.

"What did you to grandpa?" I cried.

"I-I killed your parents and then grandma." he whispered.

I kept shaking my head in disbelief. "No. . . No you couldn't have."

"Yes I did," he said. He sounded a little angry now.

"But why?" I asked.

"Because I'm sick Hannah. This thing that I am on makes me crazy. It's making me have a-a split personality. I would normally never do this." He stutters.

"I could get you some help grandpa. Make you better," I quiver. He shakes his head.

"Nothings worked sweetie," he said flatly.

"We can try harder," I growled.

"I'm done trying. Nothing can save me. Your grandma could not even help me. Look what I did to her! She was the love of my life. I cannot live without her!" he yelled.

"You have . . . my grandpa," I mumbled.

"I know, but I'm not good enough. I could kill you. I cannot take that risk," he said while shaking his head. He moves his hand onto the button to explode himself. I cannot let him do this. No way! I can't move. My body is frozen solid. It's like something has taken over me. Need to cut. . . Now! I've started cutting because of him. Maybe if he dies then I would stop. I kept shaking my head and then I felt hands on my shoulders. I jump and turn around. I see Evan and Shane.

"Guys please go. Your not apart of this!" I cried out.

"We are a part of this!" Shane gritted through his teeth. I turn back around to see my grandpa. But then I heard some other yelling's coming from the stairs. No there cannot be no police! They will take him away from me. Then I would have no family left. I want him to live. He will always have the guilt of killing his son, daughter-in-law, and the love of his life. Finally the police came crashing through the doors.

"Goodnight Hannah," grandpa whispered. I shook my head repeatedly and then grandpa pushed the button. Fire was exploding through grandpa's body. We all fly across the room. I crashed my head against the wall and my body landed on Evan. Shane was next to us. There was no more screaming, there was no noise at all. It's like everything went into slow motion when the bomb exploded. I thought I was dead. I try to move my body but it felt like it was being paralyzed. I felt warm immense hands on my arm. I open my eyes and see Evan shouting my name. Shane slowly limped; he walked across the room and started to scream. My body finally starts to move and crawls to where Shane was. Evan was slowly creeping behind. Finally I arrived where everyone was or used to be. Luna is on top of Oliver who's head is laying behind Christine. Their bodies are all over the place. Their all stretched out in odd places. It doesn't even look like their breathing. Oh God no! I see Oliver's face next to Luna's. Christine being protected by Oliver. Their faces are scratched up and black. I reach up to touch Oliver's cheek. His face is very warm. Shane is by Christine crying his eyes out. He's cradling her in his arms. This is all my fault. I shake my head and I felt Evan hand on my cheek. A tear streaks down my face. He wipes it away with his thumb and takes me in his arms. Then I felt a sharp pain in my chest. I gasp in pain and then I find myself slowly opening my eyes to a white room, like the hospital was brand new. I wipe my eyes to see better and I see a nurse checking my blood pressure. I look down and see myself in a hospital robe. And I see tubes in my arms just like how I saw Oliver, Luna, and Christine. I heard shouting coming from the other room. I hear. . . grandma? and grandpa? But grandma is dead. And grandpa killed himself. They come rushing into the room and they each take a hold of one of my hands. Grandma looks like she hasn't slept in weeks. Grandpa looks the same. But why are they here? Why am I here?

"Sweetie are you alright?'" grandma asks while brushing the hair out of my eyes.

"I- I'm fine. . . I think," I stammered. "What happened to me? Why am I here?"

"Oh dear you scared us half to death. Grandpa found you in the bathtub covered in blood. It scared us. We thought you were death. You were breathing very slowly. There was so much blood. You did a very deep cut Hannah. So much blood. . . "grandma repeated.

"I'm so sorry grandma I did not mean to scare you. I was just feeling so much pain. After when I found my parents like that I've haven't been the same. I'm sorry," I whispered.

"It's okay dear. Your grandpa and I are just glad that your okay," She breathed.

"I think I am," I muttered.

They left me alone for sleep. For the next couple of days were long. The doctors were doing tests on me all day. I was very sleepy. Whatever they gave me worked right away. The next days the doctor told grandma and grandpa that I was ready to leave. So they packed my stuff and drove me back home. Grandma made dinner and I went to bed. As I lay in bed I think about Luna, Christine, Oliver, Shane, and Evan. Will I ever see them again? I dreamed about seeing them again that night. Except Evan was there that time. He fit right in. Shane and Oliver were messing with him at first but then accepted him. It was like we were one big happy family. Then I heard my alarm clock beep. I took a shower and got dressed for school. Something was going to happen today I can just feel it. I walk through the empty halls and go to the office. The principle did not even talk to me the office lady just gave me my schedule. I went to my first hour class which was of course study hall. I walk in and give the teacher my note. He points me to a seat. I walk over but I noticed something. Evan was sitting next to me. He noticed me right away. He smiled at me when I came too sat at my desk. I look around and see Christine and Shane sitting in front of me. They smile at me too like they know. I see Luna and Oliver in front of them and they too smile at me. I smile back at all of them and including Evan. I want to make this right. No more mistakes, no more cuts.

"Hi my name is Hannah," I said.

"Evan," he smiles.


End file.
